In Love With Best Friend Part 3
Letter sender enumerates why he doubts his friendship will turn to love someday:
1. I told him that I miss the past and if we could relive it. He replied that he doesn't want to because it's the past.
2. During those masturbation sessions, he doesn't want to touch mine or me touching his even if I had proposed it for a million times. Well we've touched each others pricks for 3 times I guess, 3 out of our hundred masturbation sessions.
3. Also during those "experiments" we didn't go all out, we would just do it for a minute then continue masturbating.
4. We haven't even kissed.
5. He's gone sooo cold. I'm lucky if he'll be the one to text me first or return my calls. Yet I can't stay mad at him when I get a "sorry, was busy" text from him.
6. I've arranged for us to meet for so many times and he would always cancel it for the reason that he's too lazy to get out of the house BUT he won't invite me in their house, you know it's like he doesn't want to see me.
4 comments:
time to find a new best friend...
i was in the same "crisis" with my bestfriend too. i decided to confront him about it and it was sort of a cliffhanger because i asked him to define our relationship coz it's standing between something and nothing. he never answered me at all. i was really torn because my feelings for him were at a climax that time and i couldn't stand feeling that i always had the short end of the dick--- i mean stick. lolz.
anyway, i distanced myself from him physically and i didn't even answered his calls or his texts. eventually, he became annoying because he would try to find reasons to talk to me about trivial matters just to save himself from the awkwardness of the situation. i stood my ground and being so impulsive, i swore no to say any word to him. that's when things went sour for me. he started to harass me via facebook, posting hate remarks about, and making fun of homosexuals and stuff like that. (we've had sex three times and he bottomed for me TWICE.) it's funny how he's been trying to get my attention in that way all these years. to think he misses me that much. oh and he became fat, actually the both of us but he's way fatter than i am. XD must be depressed and all that.
i realized even if our relationship lasted longer, we would've succumb to the issues about having boy to boy love, especially him, he has a lot of issues to figure out about himself unlike me, who's ready to embrace the gay life openly.
so the best course of action i've thought of is to wait for him but not in the sense that i've closed myself for others. i don't have the perseverance to become a martyr for the sake of love. love is overrated for people like us. i did see other guys but sadly it became more of a sexual rendezvous. he still bugs me, by the way but i plan on settling things with him man to man soon to shut him up because it's getting foul. when i think of it, i kinda missed how we were but somewhere i feel that it's all my fault because if it weren't for me, things would have never went on to the way they are now. (I was the one who corrupted him. i popped his cherry hahaha >:P)
oh the pangs of being gay...
I know you're 18 and all, and I know that someday you'd outgrow all this, but Jesus, grow up already! Realize that he doesn't want to be in anything other than friendship with you. You know that he was molested and he must have trust issues, and yet by putting meaning into what for him may have just been sexual experimentation, nothing more, you're breaking that trust level you guys had because you're friends. Do you know how confusing that must be for him?! This guy,your friend, must be thinking: tangina, puro bakla na lang ba ang makakasalamuha ko sa tanang buhay ko?! He could turn out to be gay too, but again that doesn't mean he'd be into you. Read the writings on the wall: he doesn't like you like that and by pestering him with your incessant neediness, you're just driving him away. Be a friend, that's who you are to him. There are five million gay guys out there, go sleep with them instead. Get Grindr or something.
Good luck.
Nathan
your bestfriend is confused. or maybe he dont what to open such issues para hindi ka (o sya) masaktan.
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