Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Spending For Your Boyfriend
Is it okay to spend for your boyfriend? This is the question that was posted over dinner of an Italian pasta in an Ortigas restaurant together with some of my gay men neighbors.
Well, the answer during that evening is a resounding yes. Straight people spend for their partners. So why should it be different for us, gay men?
But there are some variations in perspective on this matter.
At one point, the idea is if the other one earns less than the partner (which is the case most of the time, as it is impossible to find a boyfriend to earn exactly like one does), the partner with the less income should at least purchase something that he can afford for both of them. i.e. The wealthier partner pays for the dinner while the less wealthier partner pays for the movie tickets. There should be at least a palpable effort from the other partner to show that he himself is an “investor” in this relationship.
On the other hand, the other camp says it should not matter whether the other partner actually spends or not as long as the amount that you pay for is something that you can always afford to lose. And I must admit, I belong to this camp. I don’t want to bother myself with the democratic process of financial contribution between partners. If I know that this person is worth my time and I don’t mind losing money that I can afford to lose, then why bother with “equality” of financial contributions?
How about you? What is your stand?
Labels: gay life