Friday, December 19, 2008

Breakup Survival

Emotionally, it's never easy to survive a breakup. Painful questions suddenly attack my consciousness in my moments of silence. Some tears are shed every now and then.

Suddenly for the past few weeks, I have bumped into men, that I have almost had relationship with. Seeing them happy made me feel sad of where I am right now. Did I make a wrong choice? Was my relationship a bad investment?

Feelings of inferiority confront me. Was I not worth it? And Why?

I have to admit promiscuity has been my aspirin for what seems to be a ceaseless internal pain within. And I have been going out with different men. Contorting my lean and flexible body to excellently deliver the sexual services, they crave me to do so.

Am I on the path of self destruction? I hope not. What I know is, after some time and after a certain number of men devouring me, I know, I'll get back to my old self.

For the mean time, allow me to share for the next few days, my escapades as a single gay man!


line of flight said...

perhaps you have to lose your old self to find your new one?

Anonymous said...

I was in the same situation 2 years ago. I felt very gloomy and helpless. i actually sought professional help with a therapist and got over it eventually. Your mind just like the physical body heals with time. Good luck.